I am (still) living out a childhood - the longest running illness I think I have developed. I could say my childhood continued into my early twenties. That strife, the will to be (without knowing what it was about), the unordinary moments that combined to tune me to a happiness I call my own and a pursue an entity (whose sketch lines are still in pencil).
[the preceding thought took me back to a lot of things. but i should 'expand' on them later.] that same now seems to come back. i'm fucking laughing again.
And another important addition:
Goodbye, hashish. you're in shiv's custody now. i'm not gonna ask for you for a long while, so start forgetting me. you have been a firecracker in my life - my initiation into so many circles, my crescendo on so many days, and my curling ray of sunlight. we've known each other for a good while now. remember the first time we met*? here's a secret: i'd vomited, since i felt so clumsy around you. since, i learnt to be better around you. you don't make me vomit anymore. we have come close. you know all my secrets, as if you've been running in my system.
it's said that you'll make me feel light, but i look forward to having a lighter head.
* in V's apartment in airoli
PS: the last proclamation didn't consummate, and yours truly was back on the hashwagon in a short while.
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