Chronicles of an Eclectic Life: food

Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

Saturday, February 06, 2016

new hominid subspecies

such privilege for me to be sipping on my cuppa morning tea on my balcony - so many possessives to claim - while a neighborhood hobo surreptitiously swept up crushed biscuits left on the pavement (by the 4am dog lady) for the dogs of the 'hood.

Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime.

truly, failing the adage, i could not teach the man to grow wheat and potato and build a stove and forage iron and dry salt, and rather simply threw him down a piece of flatbread that we call the Aloo Parantha, on the condition of keeping the pavement food back there. his stomach must manage very well if that's his usual modus breakfast.. homosapiens hyaenae

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Saturday, September 07, 2013

Back here, with new taste

For the whole of last month, I was in alien environments - but mostly comfortable, since this time I kept myself to the Indian cities of Bombay and Bangalore.

The first thing I did upon touching base was what I - being a Delhiite - had been desperately missing. Me and my Dilli-wallah dost P, share some things in common, this being one. With gang-rape being Delhi's favorite team sport, somebody might deduce that I'm talking about something degenerate. Not really, unless you count fat-laden food as something degenerate. I had a plate of Chhole-Bhature to mark my arrival back home. The way it is programmed into the parietal lobe, Chhole Bhature could be the shock therapy to Delhi expats to restore their sanity.

Since this log has normally segued into food, let me do a quick best-of over the past month:

Bombay/Mumbai
* Berry Pulao (@ Britannia)
* Amrakhand
* Strawberry Yogurt
* Crab [in black pepper]
* Mutton Biryani {thanks NM}
* Cheese Tortillas (@ Shiv Sagar, Pune)
* Stuffed Capsicum
* Tahri

Bangalore/Bengaluru
* Steaks (@ The Only Place)
* Steaks (@ Thulp)
* Traditional kannada(?) chicken {thanks Mahesh}
* Dosa and filter coffee combo (all over the city)

I was also offered some delicious Hyderabadi food during my journey back. I don't know names of either of the two dishes, but one was something egg and the other was a variant of lemon rice. Both were worth gorging on, although the spicy overtones successfully corrupted my tummy (as anticipated).

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Friday, November 02, 2012

Difficult fruit

If you ask me what the most difficult fruit is, I'm gonna say, straight off the bat, "Anaar" (pomegranate). The day before, I I finished one. Yesterday, while cleaning out my fridge, I found its purchase receipt, dated 19th August, 2012. That makes it 2 months and 13 days, but you could discount a couple, since I didn't immediately crack the pomegranate open. So, as it was, it took me 70 days to finish a single pomegranate, on and off in my eating routine. I'm perhaps the most conservative pomegranate eater in history of human civilization.

Mind you, I love this fruit, more so for its longevity - any lesser fruit would have been diseased by the first week itself, and sent me into the doctor's clinic.

Today, on a visit to Chandni Chowk, I got another one - a huge one. It weighed 400g on the scales, which was (almost) thrice that of the last pomegranate I finished, and cost me INR 50. It larger than the size of my fist. I shudder to think how long consuming this one would take. Handing it to those butchers whom I refer to as "others" could probably see it devoured in a single day. I could keep it as a showpiece, and in the meantime secretly nibble away its hidden half (which could last at least a month, if not more).

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Wednesday, September 26, 2012

Trust me, it's palatable

Would you trust if I tell you this is on the menu? What if I let you know its one of the best concoction mixes?

Since "2 girls 1 cup", the world will never be the same. How we see a certain texture will never be the same. But that is no ground to question my concoctions, that has a new secret ingredient so healthy and nutritious that I've adopted it into my lifestyle.
The secret ingredient is S - it won't be familiar to those outside the North Indian context or the bourgeoisie. I should write more about it later.

So, the chef-at-large in me is back sharing the good stuff.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Friday, September 07, 2012

Foodie's Night Out with HD

Me: now featuring with an added 2.2 kCals, after the dinner - comprising of a variety of meats, in a variety of preparations, and 4 kind of desserts (served twice). As irresponsible towards my manliness is to be consuming meat, equally irresponsible towards my health is to be turning my tummy into a industrial processing unit. I can now imagine my body machinery dedicating itself to assimilating nutrition from all the unprocessed stuff for the next few days, which doesn't fit with the workout ambitions. She must be really mad at me, at this repeated promise of me taking her out, but being unable to, on the account of a tragic state of my valve. For a moment jerking off in the comforts of my espacio grande seems more beneficial than such social commitments; there's Camus to read as well. But being me, I'm overcommitted in these last days in Lko, as a result of which I should be prepared to suffer my being for the entire day tomorrow as well.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Thursday, September 06, 2012

Dem gayl h8 my taste

Read this. A shared link (and no, not someone making her preference known).
By end of the first para, my thoughts went... "i have a hairy chest and geeky antics!"
By end of the article... "oh shit, why didnt i wait till the second para"
Since surveys are an average, am I supposed to fucken hate Indian girls now, on an average? On the other hand I could just trash the article, both for the trifling concerns it promotes, as well as the media source that puts it out there (reminder: ToI is a blot on journalism). No I'm not "groovy" for an Indian girl, but - in all likelihood - neither is wisdom too attractive for that person.

But why am I cribbing about trifling fornication prospects when I could be bragging about my ~~16 inches of penis~~ foodie delight in this city of Lucknow, about that Achari Gosht and Biryani at Lalbagh that I'm gonna be returning back to again and again. With the addition of the T, alone, into my social nexus, hangouts and street cruising have been transformed into wiser (albeit sometimes illegal) affairs. [there's also the S and his new Wagon R to thank, but nothing beats what the T brings] The T is one who will always be available for that need of wasting an evening in general. It was that, today.
The S picked me up from my place, then we picked up the T from his place, then drove around, until settling in a shady nook, with shady intents. The T, the S, and I, each found a role, which went towards making that final roll. Once the roll was enrolled did we roll out to have a scrumptious meal, then follow up with our 'kulhad' of lassi (that cost the same as our meal earlier). I wanted more of everything we'd had this far, but sadly these guys were done for the day.
Tomorrow it'll be beer and Rogan Josh (some outlet near Novelty Cinema) on our itinerary. I'm looking into medical procedures for removal of my entire food tract, after all the masala of this city that has featured in my tummy lately.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Monday, September 03, 2012

jalebi guy

Indian kickstart food had me pinned down for the day. After having liberal servings of jalebi, kachori, dhokla, matar poori - and also to include tea, and milkshake, - I went into an alternate reality (of dreams) that I only returned from around noon. And guess what, more food followed soon as I stepped down from the cushy bed since it was already lunch. Pamper is the right word here.

Only now that the sun nears the horizon does my day seem to have started. The gears finally feel like shifting now that I've solved the annoying issue of getting BSNL to work on the new modem, which calls for a celebration as I now get to use the Belkin with the crappy Rocknet connection. Following the resurrection of the internet, D pinged me on gtalk and reminded of some professional stuff, which I could easily shirk but will take up for a change (for a change in the past year and a half, that is). [so far I had 'smoking pot' on the itinerary, but seems like plans need be revised]

In other news, I was dreaming like it was a disease. There were people I knew, but not like that; there were buses trapped in floods, with me making my last minute exit; there were lakes and huge aquatic creatures out to get me. I guess sleeping too sound all this while in my dark chamber (aka pimp room) has left me with a backlog, or maybe sleep processing isn't a transparent process outside my dark chamber which is why I'm seeing all the more.

[PS: title of this post is supposed to be a pun on 'jalebi bai']

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Sunday, August 19, 2012

My 3 meals

Last evening, I munched on a coupla' packets of Chocos and a same number for peanuts. That was complemented with dark (56% dark) chocolate from The Choco Cafe bought earlier. There was also Pepsi and Limca, one bottle each, downed. My dinner.

This morning I accidentally ran into a guava seller and had my fix of 4 to start the day with. Then I had shortlisted a chhole-bhature candidate on my morning recce who didn't disappoint - great experience, and a shaky after-experience. My breakfast.

...

Night, I strolled out, after my Elaichi milk. An omlette-bread, and two bhuttas (roasted corn stalk), which I felt was perfect to my regimen. I've consumed two mishti doi since. A pack of peanuts, too. Brushing to kill the munchies. My dinner.

This details on my 3 recent meals.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Sunday, August 12, 2012

Mageirics diaries

Here's to a bowlful of beans just bursting to jump into my caring arms that will first kill them then turn them into the most delicious instances of eating pahari rajmah known to humans.

It has been a well kept secret among us few friends, but that it will remain since I hate feeding too many maws at a time. Last evening had it not been for my bros unannounced presence, my roomie K would've made love with my preparation of rajmah on his jute mattress. Tonight it's gonna be a repeat preparation but I hope he won't make such a mess.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Wednesday, August 08, 2012

Me eat

My sweet tooth is having something akin to its PMS. I started my day at the office with cookies at the Subway downstairs - not one, but four of those large calorie-packed cookies; they were finished by the time somebody else had arrived in the office. Before that, I left the home loaded on too sweet a cuppa coffee, complemented with a couple of toasts layered with marmalade and mixed fruit jam (so intense was my sugar drive that - as my roomie informs - I even left the stove working in the kitchen in the hurry to spread all that jam).

The sweet tooth aside, I think all of my "tooths" - maggi tooth, eggyolk tooth, masala chai tooth, rajmah tooth - are highly active right now. For I just got done with a serving of Stuffed Garlic Breadsticks. Last evening I went through Maggi noodles mixed with whatever else I could forage in the kitchen (potato, ladyfinger, chopped onions) and lots of curd.

Nobody could guess that my past week was spent in a made that is the exact opposite of the that I'm in right now. I have been on an eating spree, which might come as a compensation to the strict regime of the previous week, or as an effect of the substance abuse in the ongoing week.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

In motion with food

Here's to today's discovery - that those MTR over-the-shelf ready-to-swallow meals are worth the kick. It's not too costly for 3 guys to gorge out on Palak Paneer, Navratan Korma, and Dal Makhni for 300ish... A string of discoveries like these are sure to keep life feel in motion. Unarguably the motion needs the perfect aural accompaniment too, and it is Third Ear Band's Ghetto Raga to do that, which freezes me with the scratching of the strings. I also nominate the company of weed, and likewise Y probably nominates the presence of a female companion, to add to the flow. [In my right mind I can't get why has to feel so vulnerable, sadly even that doesn't get him anywhere.]

I'm weak in the true sense of word, as in 'physically debilitated', as it was only now at night that I'm having anything - the entire day it was a living on water and coffee and the raga. Tomorrow I'll be up early as promised, and ride out early as promised, and make code as promised, and at evening be there to see mum dad at CP, punch Shiv, and grab my chocolate cake. Important final decision on the home situation will see things for the good.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Friday, June 15, 2012

Don't You Food Me

the author feigning to eat a
clam in its entirety

Food features primarily on our itinerary for the next couple of days. There's this French place, this Italian place, this south Indian place, this Vietnamese place, this bakery, this cafe, this soup place, this lobster place, this fish place... First inquiry the PP makes upon waking up - in his first conscious moments into the day - being, "Where are we going for lunch?"

It feels like I've been held hostage to a bunch of bandits armed with an arsenal of food. Food is social, but alas, its turning into social torture for me. I'm picking calories in excess, which is not even compensated with any sort of outdoors or (mis)adventure. If that is nothing to bother about (really, I don't), my stomach has been nuked with multicultural cuisine - under the umbrella of south Indian food, that has included a lot more than the limited southie fare that one gets in North India, I have already been subjected to considerable strain. Knowing that I will be invaded by myriad international cuisines in the narrow space of two days only makes it a bigger affair to fear and lament later.

To mitigate some of that 'bubbling' fear, I started this day with a more familiar toast, peanut butter, marmalade; not that it makes my situation any better, since my fiber intake is still zero.

There is also the unfamiliar experience of "trying out" the freakishly expensive places, which is basically turning into places to damage the stomach lining at a premium cost, which is no good news for either my health or my pocket. the only worthwhile place was the one we visited last night with an equal split between the items I had liked and that I didn't. a thorough "Oye, solid thaa, yaar" experience seems impossible.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Thursday, October 13, 2011

three things

First thing:

Diwali's near, and the cacophony of human joy occasionally explodes in my ear.
Fireworks generate three very noticeable forms of energy: a tremendous release of sound, bright light, and heat. I hate all of these. Anything 'tremendous' shuts my Pyloric Valve.
For the next few days it would feel like a warzone. [well, if it were a real warzone, i'd have some advantage thanks to the towering feature of the cellular tower on my rooftop. ]
Noxious smells of several compounds (a permutation among - upto - 20 chemicals) will linger in my nostrils, and remind me why i gave up on fireworks. Ears will maintain that lingering rattle through my evenings, forewarning me that I'm to evacuate approximately 0.03s before a carelessly-fired rocket explodes on my balcony.
The eyes won't be particularly bothered, unless out there on the streets where prepubescent idiots plant atom bombs on the road... the only way to read into such a misfortune is to be on the look for kids cupping their ears in a mix of fear and excitement, or people staring at the road as if they are collectively high.

Two more things:

I just concocted "Lacto Bhang" drink (weed milk).
I presume this would be what the Indian bride serves to the bridegroom on their wedding night, to initiate a few hours of reckless rumpty.

My cottage cheese preparation of the previous week seems to have evolved into a fungus pod.
I'll give it some more time in the name of science.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Sunday, October 09, 2011

The Mocha-Bhang Coffee

Might I, my good Sir, propose to you the latest in coffee: the Mocha-Bhang. Its two of mankind's favorite 'C' ingredients collaborating together: coffee and cannabis. sweetened.

In India, this variant of cannabis is called 'Bhang', that is traditionally had with cold milk on days of religious ecstasy or as a date-rape drug. Bhang is like a log strike on the head - it thumps, and then completely stuns you for the next few hours. Those who never thought life could trip find that very encouraging, which owes to its popularity.

Bhang is found, sadly, in select places. Jaipur and Bikaner have theirs documented well over the internet. But what the foreign travelers miss to report on due to its tourism-unfriendly ways, and the local travelers miss due to it having too much of the character of India, is Lucknow, and that how Bhang is sold on the street in the main old market area. Since I now own the knowledge of its coordinates, I have been prompt to fetch some; first agenda out in this city.

Now I seem to have too much of it, and after my experiments on successive nights of mixing Bhang with: mango juice, apple juice, rhododendron extract, banana shake, oranges, and mouthwash; I have come across this deadly combo of caffeine and the 'golis'. The texture of the coffee, mixed with Bhang, feels thicker, and it goes down as a smooth sensation. The slight bitterness of Bhang is compensated for by the sweetness of the sugar in the coffee. A foamy top cover on the coffee ensures more gentle communion with the Bhang. Being hot, the fat molecules in the milk help squeeze out the THC from the Bhang. It all goes down well and slow.
I'll give it 5 Stars!

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Wednesday, August 03, 2011

Hunger strike

My hunger strike is into its 3rd day now.
Since that Ham-and-Omlette Sub with Parth on Monday evening, I've shut down my faculties of taste, bar the sensation of a lone cup of tea now and then, 2 apples, and 1 pear in total. Yesterday evening saw me at my vegetable best - out from office, straight to bed, and up again really late in the morning only to be leaving again for the office; no sneaky morsels or even ethically-permissible cups of tea consumed in all that while.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Impulsive, Inborn Chef-fing

1. KESARIYA RABRI :: debut :: last week

2. PRAWNS (before) :: debut :: today

3. PRAWNS (after...after plucking the head off, carefully extracting the pitth, peeling away the shell) :: debut :: today

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Crabbed out

pincer के दो आगे pincer, pincer के दो पीछे pincer|
आगे pincer, पीछे pincer बोलो कितने pincer?

Had crab for dinner last night! what a monstrous thing to dissect through. I went straight for the pincers. In a land (or a newly moved-into apartment) sans hammers or shell-crackers, I proceeded with wrestling with every joint and ligament, ripping them apart with my bare claws, cracking open the shell with my teeth, sucking in the alien juices, and discovering general anatomy of the crustacean. Large crab, and a proportionally large effort. Karthik and his ma (who'd got the crab for us all the way from Vishakhapatnam) were amused seeing me adapt to it.

Youtube nationals start by teaching you to break open the crust, disposing it away, and savoring the innards. I rather consumed it all - the calcium-y shell in small chips, breaking them off, then grinding them with my semi-healthy teeth; still waiting for my tummy for final report to that.

It is hard to imagine being put in a boiling cauldron, die, coagulate into a lump, then being savoured - that too on a scale of millions each day. Chopping off heads, like we do to hen, is much less cruel - though this cruelty starts on a whole different scale.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Thursday, August 06, 2009

Overrated Gullu

Gullu Meat Wala isn't difficult to locate; however its location is such that first-timers would find themselves confused: Take the road into Malka Ganj at the Hansraj-Malkaganj crossing, go a hundred yards, there it is!

For a sample of overrated Mughlai food in Delhi, look nowhere beyond Gullu's. Tucked inside Malka Ganj, at a location you won't believe could sustain such a takeaway joint, Gullu Meat Wala (GMW) has been a much-cherished secret among Delhi-ites, some of whom even claim it to be one of the better foodie places. However, the cold truth is that these folks have either been feeding under the influence of alcohol, or peer pressure, both of which numb the senses equally. There's also the need among DU-ites to patronise a nearby joint; and lacking any other option, Gullu's is IT.

What's good about Gullu is that their work environment seems very hygenic and their service seems organised.
What's bad is that they have a limited menu, their food sucks, much of their gravy is sweet, use of oil is to disgusting proportions, no home delivery, unhygenic/unsafe surroundings immediately outside their sparkling tiled verandah, and a narrow time-frame during which they serve.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Sunday, May 10, 2009

Lucknow keeps its women locked

There's one aspect of the City of Nawabs (Lucknow) I hate: the purdah culture. Not the Islamic thing, but the general policy of keeping the women under seclusion and under the covers that is not restricted to any religions.
Had gone out on a post-dinner lassi hunt yesterday to this place called Koneshwar Temple,in THE Chowk. The eldest of my cousins was incharge of operations. Surprise hit when he strictly forbid the ladies from stepping out, since he felt that the crowd outside wasn't good...for all I could perceive, there was another family parked besides us (ladies inside, of course) and 2 or 3 men at the large expanse of the front steps of the shop. There were no gangs on bikes, or men drunk and loitering about, or men sneaking away lecherous glances around; and it was a prominent junction with good lights, not some back alley. The only women outside were a couple of burqa-clad ones having lassi (and enjoying it).

Then an incident a day before came into memory - when Shiv (male), accompanied by Aditi (female), had gone out for Paan (पान, پان, Betel Nut). As by Shiv's accounts, the stall owner was uneasy with Aditi's presence and asked her to have a seat in the car itself. Shiv felt that it might've been because of the 'crowd'. Again, this shop is the most prominent of places to have the delightful Paan in Lucknow. It is situated close to Hazratganj, which is the Times Square of Lucknow, and the surroundings and cleanliness hint at the privileged area it is. It was broad daylight; there were people around; there was Shiv and me, besides another XXL-sized cousin to take care of things. Yet there had to be a warning.

So, the Muslim folks keep their women away from prying eyes by wrapping a burqa round them. The Hindus match up to them by wrapping huge tin sheets (called cars) around their women. Inferring as to which gives more freedom is a point of debate. Anyways, this is color of Lucknow you won't like to see.

Heard from somebody that Lucknow is now the 2nd fastest growing non-metro city in India, following Pune. But from the attitudes and the general 'culture' here, I can confirm that the Lucknow-ites would face a backlash if they step into the ring with the other big cities, where each gender enjoys considerably more freedom.
Have you been served with (or been serving) such disclaimers? Is there any incident that confirms this general opinion? Or is this a stale opinion derived 20 years back in the past, a typical psychosis?

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Waxing prosaic in Rishikesh

1700
I'm back to the rock and sands that mark my year. 'Back' is potentially misleading, because this is not a relapse, no coming a full circle...just back in the geographical sense. This is Rishikesh where I was in December the past year, thinking over simple things. Then, after a year of wonderful facts, I'm still thinking, but of things that have mutated into a forcibly greater meaning and context. This is nothing holy or spiritual, just questions arising from my affiliations to the society and present era. India has never seemed this confusing before, and my world has never been this confused about me.

1825
There are only 2 places in Rishieksh worth lounging at: the corner seat at the Devraj Cafe and the last seat at ~~Shiva~~Ganga Beach Cafe. Any place else, and you're either too far from R. Ganga and missing the whole reason of being, or in a place where an unexpected number of goras smoking substances make you feel alienated, cramped and looking for an exit. Right now I'm 'missing my reason of being', since I'm a few seats away from that holy seat at Devraj Cafe. But I'm still overlooking the river, though as a part of a montage of the unpleasant drainage pipes, the dumps, dimly-lit shops and the crackpot sadhus - all this lies right next to the great Ganga (Ganges).

50 minutes later
Gabriella did help unwind a bit. I dug her. She's technically a Lithuanian living in Sweden who claims to belong to no particular country and has her history scribed in Lithuania, Sweden, America and India. This is her 3rd visit to India, 1st to Rishikesh and leaves back for Sweden from Delhi on the 14th morning. Here for yoga - and meditation, which she claims is inclusive - she reminds me of the 'sweet little gone gal' of the 60s beat culture - though a bit restrained and deeper. I and her talk about yoga, its practise, application and expanding its definition, her job, her stay here, her travel with this guy (whom she's taking for a fatherly figure but can't really gel with). And then ecology, conservation, mankind being a pest, mankind being a slave of its own condition - things that I get a better hook on. Been just 6 minutes of her leaving, but I already can't draw her in words now - I'm easily distracted in this place. I don't think that my attempts at expressing my little revealations found much audience in her, but I did get a greater share of her chocolate pastry block which was - really was - too big for her. "You are a big man, you can manage this much!" Wooho! I got free chocolate. It was fate; I was meant to consume you. Talk about taking 'brownie points' literally.

Widget by Css Reflex | TutZone

Subscribe to: Posts (Atom)