Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Losing it as the end draws near

Minutes to midnight, and I'm still far from confident for my last exam. The syllabus is so messed up! A sprinkle of this, a dash of that, it feels like they're trying to make it look good just on paper - to deceive the audience that ours is a balanced and thorough course. 'A larger pile of papers' is more like it. Nobody cares anymore.

Had a listen to a remix one of my classmates had emailed. It was miserable. Had to put on Thomas Newman to cleanse my ears. Emergency measures.

For the next hour I'll be vacillating between my books and the net. Its too risky to boot the computer late night - hours fly by idling away time. Much of the relationship I've had with my machine this semester has been passive. Its been so, with all of the following factors contributing to equal levels: adjusting to the lifestyle of living alone, absence of any net connection for the first couple of months, minor affair with fiction, wanderlust - more than ever, longing for Elin, coming across my beast of a new laptop (and vista and all its irritations) and {silence}. Meh, but I've been up and about with other stuff. Just stuff that doesn't give me any direction for my future :P Lots of random new stuff.

ps: just maield the friend about how miserable his song was. now i mix up another cup of coffee and try to carry it through the night. a few more blogposts in my caffeinated frenzy, perhaps.

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